Beside the Water
by Tasyin
Summary: A few weeks after the final battle Zuko and Mai find a moment to talk about everything that's happened between them. Not Maiko.


I'm not sure whether or not this really qualifies as Maiko. In a way it's my own way of setting up a future Zutara, but it's also a stand alone. Ever since I saw TBR I've been thinking about their next meeting, and how that conversation might go. That episode made me really admire the way that good writing can really take a character who had been the terrible victim of bad writing in the past and make her come into her own. For the first time I actually liked Mai, and felt sorry for her. She's been through a lot and hasn't had a lot of credit.

So this takes place a few weeks after the battle. Everything has almost (not really) settled down and Zuko decides to be a man and have a rather necessary conversation with his poor spurned lover.

* * *

He found her by the pool they'd played in as children

He found her by the pool they'd played in as children. She sat on the edge of the fountain, and as he stood by the arched entryway he remembered a day when everything was much simpler and a sad smile crossed his face.

He took a step forward, and the cracking of a branch under his foot made Mai spin around to stare at him. Zuko flinched as he saw how bedraggled she still looked. He couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from the raw red circles left on her wrists by the manacles of Azula's dungeon. Her clothes were fresh, but her eyes made it clear that the memories and pain of that day at the Boiling Rock and every day since haunted her, even if her face said nothing.

"They said you wanted to see me as soon as I was out." She said, her voice raspier than normal. "So I came at the beckon of the great Fire Lord Zuko."

"Please don't call me that." He managed to say. His gaze dropped and he looked down at the ground. "Walk with me."

Silently she moved to his side and he began walking through the gardens, moving from one area to the next. It was strange to see that these gardens had hardly changed. Comforting, and yet also not as the longing for a time gone by swept over him again. But he knew that things were better now. The Fire Nation was better now, he would make it so.

"Why did you send for me Zuko." Mai's voice startled him. Zuko had stopped by the turtleduck pond and had been standing silently for some time, staring down at the turtleducks as they swarmed to the shore in case any of the visitors had brought them a treat.

He cleared his throat, unsure how to proceed. "I've provided a full pardon for you and Ty Lee," he tugged at the collar of his tunic nervously. " I know you were just following orders and neither of you really meant any serious harm to any-," his voice broke off as she stared at him scornfully.

"That's what the letter you sent to get us out of prison said. Why am I here today?"

The big question, the one he'd been having so much trouble facing. Haltingly he started speaking again, this time more slowly. "I wanted to…apologize to you. I…we never got the chance to talk the last time we saw each other and-," she cut him off.

"You mean when you locked me in a jail cell and ran away? Is that what you're talking about?" The look in her eyes cut him.

"Yes. When I treated you horribly and you repaid my treachery by saving my life. All of our lives." He paused, took a breath. She didn't interrupt so he continued, still staring down at the turtleducks and avoiding looking at her. "I just wanted you to know that I never forgot that. I did everything I could to help Aang because that's what needed to be done, but I never meant to hurt you and I…just wanted you to know."

She was silent, and he finally got up the courage to look at her. Her eyes were focused on the turtleducks, but she watched them without interest. "You know, I always hated these turtleducks. I laughed when Azula decided to throw the whole loaf of bread at them. I chased the Avatar with her because I was bored, and because it was a change from sitting around being a Fire Nation noble who spent her days being useless."

"But you saved us. Why?" He asked.

"Because I loved you. And that's what you do for the people you love, you trust them with everything and you'd do _anything_ for them." Zuko saw the tears start to stream down her face, and he had an urge to brush it away. He stilled his hand as she continued. "You never loved me. Not the way I loved you."

"Mai I-"

"Don't say it. You love your country and you love doing the right thing. Who am I to compete with that. Thank you for freeing me, and Ty Lee. You have our thanks." She turned to face him. The horrors of whatever had happened to her were fresh in her gaze and he understood. She didn't want him. She still thought it had been the right thing to do, but they both knew he hadn't deserved it. And she wouldn't let him hurt her like that again.

"But-" He said halfheartedly. Before he could say any more she turned and left him standing there by the turtleduck pond. He sat down and rested his arms on his knees, glad he could still wear his comfortable traveling clothes in this part of the palace.

He wasn't sure what he had been expecting, but it wasn't that. The romantic part of him had expected her to come running back into his arms. After what she'd done for him at the Boiling Rock even the pragmatic part had pretty much expected _that_.

The worst part was that he couldn't decide if he was happy that she'd done that. It sickened him that there was a part of him that was excited and joyful, the part that knew it would never work out. But he had loved her, in his own way. He sighed. Zuko supposed, if it came to it he would have a hard time loving someone who cared more for their country too.

In front of him the turtleducks quacked and he couldn't help but smile at them. It seemed that no matter what was happening in his life the little creatures always knew how to cheer him up. Matters of love, life and state could wait, he thought to himself as he took out the hunk of bread he always brought when he was heading to the gardens. For now, the turtleducks needed to eat, and if he wasn't quick about it they'd get testy and unhappy. He smiled. Everything else could wait.


End file.
